Sheth Shack Garage Sale 2011.

28 Dec

Question: What is worst than having a garage sale at your house?

Answer: Having a garage sale when you are hungover.

My head screamed at me for the excessive consumption of frozen margaritas & tequila nights. My stomach screamed at me for consuming an entire bag of kettle chilli chips at 3:30am. My mum screamed at me for not getting out of bed and helping.

It was 6:45am. On a saturday morning. Already, the hardcore regular ‘garage sale hawks’ had started to crowd on our driveway. What was wrong with these people? Didn’t they have anything better to do? Didn’t they have enough junk of their own? Admittedly, there were a few ‘diamonds’ amongst the clothes, toys and nik naks. Notably:

1. A relatively new coffee machine, which my dad had accidently (but permanently) set to the spanish language.

2. My ‘study’ desk which I studied on for my entire school career (apologies for the inappropriate ‘engravings’…I was bored at the time)

3. A chalk-drawn self-potrait of my face (suprisingly, that went unsold).
In saying that, I had a lot of difficulty parting with things. secretly did gather a few objects that were for sale and put them back in the house. Memories started flooding back. The plasterfun house scultpture I had painted for my mum. The signed copy of my Bardot CD…..

I had envisioned a relaxing day, sipping on lemonade whilst watching people sift through our various objects.

Nope. It was hell. The sun belted down on me. I concentrated on re-hyrdateing and bribed my sister to buy me breakfast. I had to control my temper when the old lady from up the road, as she haggled for a box of books. Refusing to pay $1 then asking me to break $100 note for her. I also wanted to punch the boy next door as we demanded that I get the circa 1995 Nintendo gameboy to function.

It was exhausting attempting to fake smile and ethusiatically turn on my sales pitch (“yes! this old embroidered hankerchief definitely matches your handbag”…) when all  I wanted to do was crawl up in the dark.

By the end of the day nearly everything was gone. As they say, one persons trash is another persons treasure. However, I still dont understand, what possessed people to buy single earings, used salad servers and my dad’s ugly tracksuit pants.

Garage sales- a fascinating, cleansing domestic exercise. However, one word of advice: DO NOT do it hungover.



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